Monday, April 11, 2011

I Need Help

I need help.

Someone help me.

I have a problem.

This is a big problem folks, even bigger than my usual problem: Too much sugar consumption.

And what makes it even worse it the fact that there is no cure.  None, whatsoever.  I've researched, and researched, and I can't find a remedy...not even medication can fix it!

The problem is I cannot talk.

Physically, sure, of course I can talk physically, but mentally, like in my head....yea, that's where it stops.

And if that doesn't make sense (which it probably doesn't...very rarely do I make sense) I'll give you an example...Or two, or three, just to make my point.

Example #1:

A normal person talking: "Wow!  It's such a sunny day!"

Me talking:  "Wow! It's such a dunny say!"

.....I told you it was bad....

Example #2:

Normal person:  Ouch...I have a stick in my boot.

Me:  Ouch, ouch, ouch! Ahh!..I have a boot in my stick.

Example #3:

Normal person:  Quit being loud, you'll bother Harold and Fay.

Me: Quit being loud, you'll bother Farold and Hay.

(Did I  mention it was Really, REALLY bad?)

Ok, so if those examples aren't sufficient...I don't know what is.

I don't know what could have caused this problem either?

Is it the result of too much sugar consumption?

Is it because of that one time I drank too much cough syrup, and then fell asleep for a really long time...uh, nevermind I won't go there...

Or is it because I have too much stress on my brain can't handle much stress, it makes me stressed.

Whatever the reason, I have to fix it fast. 

I have a huge interview coming up where I'll have to give a speech in front of 30 different people...THIRTY people. 
Did I mention there would be thirty people surrounding me?
Did I mention I was claustrophobic?
Did I mention I sometimes laugh alot in front of big crowds?
Did I mention I like cake?...Sorry, just thought I'd throw that in there...
Did I also mention that I sometimes make dumb jokes in front of a lot of people?  Yea, well, I do...

Anyways, Let's get to the point: I need help.

Please help me.

Please help me before my tongue falls off, or I say something dumb....Well it's probably too late for the "say something dumb" thing....

Please help me before I say something really dumb.

Fray por me.

Oh no....It's too late!

Leace, Pove, & I'm teaving lown.

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