Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Call Animal Control, or Anger Management!

What's the first thing you do in the morning?

Do you hit the snooze button?

Take a shower?

Run a mile?  (Definitely what I would do....OK, I lied...someone slap me please.)

Fry some bacon?  ( Um, yes I think this sounds a little more like me.)

The "fry some bacon" has begun to become increasingly more popular with me.  Not for the obvious reason, because it's W-O-N-D-E-R-F-U-L, but because well....I hate my pigs.

OK, that was harsh, hate is a strong word, I don't hate them, I just wish I could take a frying pan, or a BB Gun, or a Nun chuck, and make bacon (or sausage) out of them RIGHT NOW!
(No I don't need anger management, Leave Me Alone!!!)

You see this "anger" isn't coming because it's something natural for me, I'm usually a very calm, keep your head kind of girl...Excuse me for a minute while I go pummel my brother, he won't quit talking....But these pigs have just pushed me too far.  They are provoking me!

Every time I try to feed them they go for the attack.

The push, they shove, and they bight me with their fangs...

(You think I'm kidding? Well friends, I can only wish I was.)

And then I end up crying all the way home...aren't the pigs the ones that are supposed to cry?  All the way home?

My most recent injury from them is a huge bight, ahem, fang, mark on my index finger. 

It's large.

It's purple.

And I frequently show it to people so they will believe me.

But I don't have any believers yet...

Will you believe me??

Will you call the animal control??

Because I can't take it anymore!  These pigs are driving me crazy, and are a threat to my over-all well being.

Something has to be done.

Peace, Love, & I suddenly have a craving for Pork Chops.

Sweet(?) T

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